Most Wanted Man
by AdelaideArcher
Summary: All Severus had ever desired was to be wanted.


The title comes from the beautiful Paul Kelly song, "Most Wanted Man in the World".

Huge thanks as always to Hikorichan and Melody LePetit for being the best betas in the world, and lovely friends.

This one is for my friend and fellow Paul Kelly fan, lena1987

Severus Snape was under no illusions about his appearance. All his life his physical flaws had been pointed out relentlessly. _Pale. Hook nose. Greasy bat_. No, Severus had long since come to terms with the visage that greeted him with a marked lack of enthusiasm in the bathroom mirror as he lathered up each morning. "Looks aren't important, Severus," his mother said, back in the days when she had bothered speaking.

Young Severus never quite understood that. He'd been utterly dazzled by Lily's fiery locks and sparkling eyes, and he was astute enough to note and resent the preferential treatment she, along with the other beautiful people, received from everyone, Muggle and Magical alike.

Arriving at Hogwarts he witnessed first hand the bold, handsome Marauders winning hearts and accolades throughout the school for nothing more than presiding over a bullying reign of terror. Surely, he thought, his superior intellect would win him a few friends, even if it was packaged in a less than appealing exterior. However, rampaging hormones are the same the world over and Severus found himself no better off for friends and admirers than he had been at Spinner's End. Worse off, to his dismay, even Lily eventually succumbed to the charms of Potter and his sidekick Black.

Beautiful Lucius Malfoy flattered, bullied and cajoled Severus until he joined the ranks of handsome Lord Voldemort's Death Eaters. It was a matter of weeks before Severus realised what a terrible decision he had made, months until he prostrated himself in front of Albus Dumbledore, and not quite two years until his beloved enchantress Lily was murdered.

After that, looks didn't matter. Nothing much mattered at all. Severus went through the motions for many a long year, barely noticing his increasingly pinched, exhausted features.

The years blurred until the day Albus announced that Lily's son would be at Hogwarts in September. Severus spent the next three years in a constant state of irritation, which was at least a change from the torpor of the previous decade. Terror joined irritation halfway through Potter's fourth year when his dark mark began to darken in preparation for Voldemort's return.

And then, the war years. After the Cruciatus, insults such as Slimy Git seemed almost benevolent. Yet Severus longed, in the part of himself that he kept firmly battened down, for just one person who saw him and wanted him. Someone who would say, "How lovely to see you," or "I've missed you," or "I wish you were here." He didn't bother dreaming of more than that.

He was as surprised as anyone when he survived the war. Nagini's venom had been finely tuned since Arthur Weasley had survived her attack. Severus dutifully swallowed the preventative potions he had devised without expecting they would do much, if anything, were Nagini to attack him. But his potions, together with Luna Lovegood's insistence that someone go back to the shack to retrieve his body after hearing the story, seemed to be enough. He suspected that Miss Granger had accompanied her bizarre friend purely to shut her up, but he supposed he was grateful that she had, and grateful for her battlefield first aid experience. The two young women had been able to patch him up enough to get to the infirmary, where Poppy Pomfrey alternately cossetted him and railed at him for not telling her the truth of the past year. Scarred inside and out, he had retreated to his dungeon, coming out only to appear in court as Kingsley went through the motions of clearing his name.

Back in his dungeons, he sighed when he heard a knock at the door. Minerva or Poppy, no doubt, come to check on him yet again. Upon opening it, he was startled out of his lethargy when he saw Miss Granger. If he'd had the energy he'd have slammed the door in her face, but somehow it seemed easier to let her in. She had taken his reluctant invitation at face value, and began appearing at his door at random times and with increasingly transparent excuses.

Finally losing his patience, he had cracked. "Why are you here, Miss Granger?"

She blushed. "Because I like to see you. I like talking to you. I like your rooms. I like your books. I like the way you listen to me and take me seriously. I… I like _you_ , Severus. That's why I'm here."

Had anyone ever said these words to him? The hatches where he had bolted down his deepest desire - for a friend - opened slightly. Feeling somewhat adrift, he gazed silently at her. He noticed, with amazement, her blush deepen under his quiet scrutiny.

She opened her mouth as if to speak, then closed it again.

Severus realised she was waiting for a response.

"Miss Granger - Hermione - you are welcome here."

She never left.

Severus wasn't quite sure how it had happened, but he now had a flatmate. A female flatmate, with whom he shared, platonically, a bed. Until one night it wasn't quite so platonic. Lying in bed next to Hermione, she had turned to him. "Severus?"

"Yes?"

"I think I love you."

Turning his head to look at her, her lips met his in a chaste kiss. The vault was completely open now, and all of his repressed longings came tumbling out. He gasped, and caught her lips again in another kiss, deepening it this time and twining his tongue with hers until they were both breathless with desire. He forced his body away from hers.

"Hermione, I know what I am. You deserve so much more than me."

She sighed, and stroked his cheek.

"Severus, I know you too. And I love you. That's not going to change."

Over time, she somehow managed to convince him that she _did_ love him, and she _wasn't_ going anywhere, which he decided was lucky for her, because he certainly wasn't going to let her go in a hurry. Only then did he feel able to tell her what she already knew; that he loved her more than he had ever thought possible.

Severus Snape was not a conventionally handsome man, but when he was with Hermione, he knew he was the most wanted man in the world.


End file.
